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Post by rhomer on Feb 20, 2005 11:05:55 GMT 8
In a murder trial, a defense lawyer cross examining the coroner.
LAWYER : Before you signed the death certificate, did you check the pulse?
CORONER : No
LAWYER : Did you listen to the heart?
CORONER : No
LAWYER : Did you check for breathing?
CORONER : No
LAWYER :  So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren't sure the man was dead, were you?
CONONER : Let me put it this way. The man's brain was sitting in a jar on my table. But i guess it could be possible that he could be out there practicing law. ;D ;D ;DNO OFFENSE TO LAWYERS... DYOK ONLY... 
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Post by poison on Feb 20, 2005 15:03:49 GMT 8
AHENTE: tok-tok sa balay!!
pag abri sa purtahan gi sabwag ang tae sa kabayo ug mi ingon...
AHENTE: Madam pag dili ni palimpyo sa akong vacuum cleaner kaonun ko ning tae!!!
TAG-BALAY: hala!! sugdi na ug kaon kay blackout baya karn ;D
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Post by Emerald_Justice on Feb 21, 2005 10:14:22 GMT 8
hahaha nice one
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Post by jet on Feb 21, 2005 20:32:28 GMT 8
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seaseed
Private Cheetah
...PUT ON YOUR SWIM FINS AND DIVE WITH ME!!!
Posts: 17
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Post by seaseed on Mar 5, 2005 14:02:48 GMT 8
:)hooyah!!! master chief!!!
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Post by Emerald_Justice on Apr 13, 2005 12:59:37 GMT 8
thingyPit jokes:
1)Paano mo malaman kung may tanga sa sabongan?
-Pag magdala ng pato.
2)Paano mo malaman kung may mas nakakahigit na tanga sa kanya?
-Pag may lumaban sa pato
3)Paano mo malaman kung madami ang tanga sa sabungan?
-Pag madami ang nagpusta sa pato
4)Paano mo malaman kung may dayaan sa sabongan?
-Pag nanalo ang pato. ;D
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Post by Emerald_Justice on Apr 13, 2005 13:16:15 GMT 8
in a court house: Defendant talking to his lawyer.. Defendant: if i lost this case im ruined....what if i give the judge a Cigar??? Lawyer:NO! if your going to give this judge a cigar you would be prejudice him against you, he has high ethical value! in fact you shouldnt smile infront of the judge. Within the course of time the judge rendered the Defendant "Not Guilty" As the defendant walks out in the court house he said to the lawyer "Thanks for the tip about the cigar,it work!" Lawyer: im sure if you have given the judge the cigar we would have lost, lawyer smiled. Defendant: But i did send them! Lawyer: you did!  Defendant: Yes! thats how we won the case. Lawyer:...i dont understand? Defendant: Ow its simple, i send the Cigar to the judge and inclosed is the accusers Calling card..... |
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Post by rhomer on Apr 13, 2005 20:37:23 GMT 8
;D HA-HA-HA...  HE-HE-HE... HI-HI-HI...  HO-HO-HO...  HU-HU-HU... Pre... basig burakan ta ni atorni joey aning mga dyok nato... puro lawyer igo... ;D |
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Post by teaserz on Nov 21, 2006 0:22:14 GMT 8
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Post by 19sheriff68 on Nov 25, 2006 11:33:53 GMT 8
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Post by rhomer on Nov 26, 2006 7:41:04 GMT 8
he.he.he ... iba na ang sikat ... anybody would want to impersonate you just to earn some money ... nice joke but it doesn't work for me ... hi.hi.hi...  |
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Post by rhomer on Jun 6, 2008 19:25:31 GMT 8
A man thought that his wife is cheating on him. Since he didn't have a lot of money to hire an expensive private investigator, he decided to go with a much cheaper one -- a Chinese man named Mr. Lee. The following day he received following report:
Most honorable sir:
You leave house. I watch house. Man come to house. I watch. He and your Wife leave house. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss she. She kiss he. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he.
I play with me. I fall off tree. I not see ......... No fee.
Chen Lee[/size]
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Post by roGer da poGi on Feb 6, 2009 17:50:09 GMT 8
A night before their wedding...
The guy went to his girlfriend's house. While waiting for his girlfriend at the living room, his girlfriend's hot sister told him, "if u like to make love with me, i'm upstairs!" He stood up and was shocked, a bit confused... Then he made up his mind and turned his back to go to his car parked outside. To his surprise, his girlfriend is waiting outside with tears in her eyes saying, " you passed the test, I'm happy to be your wife!" The moral value of this story is:
Always keep your condoms in your car...hahahaha
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Post by 19sheriff68 on Feb 6, 2009 17:54:06 GMT 8
nganong nahimu naman kung guest diri!
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Post by 19sheriff68 on Feb 6, 2009 17:56:31 GMT 8
The 3 expectant fathers
Three men are sitting in the waiting room of a hospital.
A nurse walks over to the first one and says, "Congratulations. You're the father of twins." "What a coincidence," he says. " I work for a Twin Tower Bank."
A while later, the nurse comes out to congratulate the second man. "You are the proud father of triplets," she tells him. " That's funny, says the new dad. " I work for AAA."
The Third expectant father jumps up, a look ofterror on his face, and runs for the door. "Sir, where are you going?" the nurse calls out. He yells over his shoulder, " I work for 10,000 Auto Parts!"
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Post by skipper on Mar 1, 2009 13:16:25 GMT 8
unsaon ni ha.wala mankoy joke oi.sge ako nalang taga katawa sa joke nyo.bwaaaaaaaahahah
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Post by untouchable on Jun 17, 2009 0:19:22 GMT 8
DINA : nag dinner kami ng boyfriend ko kagabi. Grabe, impressed ako..
TINA : bakit?
DINA : anlaki ng resto at ang daming choices....
TINA : WOW ! ! ano name ng resto?
DINA : FOODCOURT!
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So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren't sure the man was dead, were you?
HE-HE-HE... 
HO-HO-HO... 
HU-HU-HU...
